"The Lord is spanking us"

Please note: This post includes passing references to my tastes in Internet porn. Family members and others who don't want to read that, please don't.

This would be hilarious if it weren't so fucked-up.

Okay, it's still hilarious. But it's also fucked up.

I mean, what kind of heartless bastard teaches children that they get sick because they've been bad? What kind of heartless bastard teaches children to feel guilty when they get sick?

I'll tell you what kind. The kind that pictures Jesus in a Bee Gees haircut, that's what kind.

And don't tell me that this isn't the true faith. I am so sick of that "true faith" stuff I could yak. Millions of people believe this sort of thing -- what makes it not true belief?

Via Adele Haze’s "Spanking Model Speaks". Greta Christina's blog: Your one-stop connection between the atheosphere and the spankosphere.

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Update: This is officially no longer hilarious. No, the comic isn't a satire. It turns out to have been produced by The Family, a.k.a. Children of God, an abusive evangelical Endtime religious movement/ cult/ missionary organization. There's a citation of it in this legal document; it's 295 pages long, but it's indexed, and you can find a reference to it at the top of the "Medical Neglect" section.

I need to take a bath now. This is repulsive.

Comments

[Noxx]

That's just the kind of cartoon that would get me hot for Jesus in my youth...and not in the way the artist probably intended (and despite the BeeGees haircut).

[Pi Guy]

Yes, people still believe it. My mother still believes it and she was a nurse!

spankosphere

*chuckles at desk*

[sexposfemme]

it's weird that people can be so limited in their thinking. God is omnipotent but the best he can do to teach us a lesson is to cosmically spank us?

[Efrique]

I cannot help but see this kind of thing as child abuse.

[Jeff]

I'm curious to know where (and by whom) this was originally published. Anybody know?

[Robert Madewell]

surely this is a satire. I have never seen a pamphlet with anything like that and I am a real ex-extreme fundie. If it's genuine, please let me know the title, publisher, author, etc. Want, want, want!

[Jason - GorillaSushi]

You compare Jesus's doo to the Bee Gees, add some suggestive spanking talk and DON'T drop a "How Deep Is Your Love" joke? You are stronger than I.

[OzAtheist]

apart from the perversity of jebus spanking someone for being naughty; that cartoon is just a little bit kinky. I want to know where that girls hands are? They are under the covers, and she's imagining being spanked, hmmm makes me wonder.

I could imagine some people have that kind of fantasy a lot! ;-)

[IsaacJ]

People believe the weirdest stuff and refuse to dislodge it from their brain. I used to be a Jehovah's Witness "back in the day" before I became an atheist. Years ago, I went through a dry spell where I had trouble finding work. My father-in-law to be told me that if I really wanted to find work, Jehovah would have provided me with a job! So clearly, I just didn't want to. (&@%#&@!!!!) Well gee, that's fair. And thanks for the sentiment. Good thing God never tested anyone in the Bible by just sitting back and letting bad crap happen, huh? Speaking of Job...

The almighty Watchtower Society actually used to teach that wasn't a scriptural view...even though Witnesses are told to credit Jehovah for everything good and Satan for everything bad. But he chose to take this route anyway. So I applied similar reasoning and decided that if he wasn't looking for an excuse to look down on me, he wouldn't have found such a lame one.

Ah, now we're even. Fair is fair after all.

But irrationality of this type is a convenient way of feeling like you're the one in charge. "One Bible to rule them all, one Bible to judge them all...as administered by any prick who feels the need to rule and judge everyone else."

[stephen]

twisted. Very twisted. we have kiddie porn (the girl seems underage), Religious porn, kinky sex, Insect sex ( a fantasy of my girlfriends). you may have entered the most fucked thing the internet has to offer today, Greta. That is an accomplishment to hang one's life on. I must try to top it tomorrow. Another perfect example of why I read your column

[ER]

The people who say those kinds of things are healthy, usually. They think they are healthy because they are somehow morally superior to everyone else. Then, when something happens to them, it is because their faith is being tested and they, of course, will pass the test.

I wonder what kind of childhoods these people had.

[Billy (A Liberal Disabled Vet)]

Given the past thirty years of problems with the catholic (as well as other) church(es), does any one else look at that cartoon and, well, um. . . Wonder?