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I love the new religions... I adore discordianism and pastafarianism, I love Laveyan Satanism, and Raelism, Jedi, Invisible Pink Unicorn, etc. are all great I think. I could never worship an ancient book, an ancient tradition, there is too much inertia, too much stuck in the past. I want something new.

Melanie Heisey

I am currently a secular Pastafarian because I like the communion and sense of humor shared within the congregation, and the pirates of course.

I also like Jediism. It's a nice, non-wooish brand of Taoism, with a nice flair of LeVeyan Satanism on the dark side. I've always had a thing for those two extremes, one a doctrine of submission and the other a doctrine of self-will, but I could never reconcile to myself choosing one over the other. The Taoist master has serenity within himself, yet the greatest human accomplishments have come from those who dare to go against the flow and attempt the impossible.

I've decided that we're all just the captains of our own boat--when the time is right we can unfurl our sails and sail with the wind to our destination. The key is knowing when to unfurl the sails and when to set your men on paddling.

Anyways, I'm keeping the lightsaber along with my pirate hat, with a few ninja stars thrown in for good measure.


Why does everyone assume that you would have to follow an organised religion. Remember what the task was:

"Let's say He/She/It asked for your worship... but said you could do it any way you wanted to. What would it be?"

Given the state of the world, I would conclude that this entity was either not all-powerful or not completely benevolent -he/she didn't claim to be. That excludes a lot or organised religion. If I followed an organised religion and accept their dogma I would assume to know a lot more about this entity, the state of the soul etc. than I really do.

I would simply meditate over the world and my experience with this deity -possibly coming up with modest suggestions for improving the world. That counts as worship in my definition and it is the most intellectually honest worship I could do (I would suspect I was chosen for this revelation because of my intellectual honesty).

I would not try to proselytize. The deity made an effort to show him/herself to me (and possibly select other people) alone.


Bruce Gorton

I was into the Tao for a while. I like the basic optimism at the heart of it, and the poetry works.

That said - it would kind of depend on why I wasn't an atheist.

For ezample if it was because someone proved the Abarahamic God - I would probably be a Satanist. There are very few versions of that particular deity that shouldn't be opposed on moral grounds.


Bruce, I've actually had serious theological talks with satanists (Temple of Set, not LeVay's bunch), and they actually have a coherent morality and theology.

Basically, screw this submission and sheep and "drop-kick me Jesus through the goalposts of life" stuff; it is immoral for Yahweh to "test" humans like a kid with a magnifying glass at an anthill, and trusting him to know best is idiotic.

Lucifer got his name dragged through the mud for pointing out the immorality. (Parallels to Bradley Manning are probably relevant here.)

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